chapter 8 chair 2 saga
Chapter 8
The Gaslighter’s Guide to Apologies That Say Nothing but Still Make You Cry
Written by: Candz — Former Collector of Sorrys, Current Owner of Boundaries.
Scene:
Me, curled in a hoodie with snacks, rereading a WhatsApp apology that somehow made me feel like I owed him a f*cking fruit basket for his bad behavior.
Let me paint you the picture:
“I’m really sorry if anything I did made you feel like I was manipulating you. That was never my intention.”
Translation: I 100% did that shit, but here’s a passive-aggressive "if" so you look like the unhinged one for noticing.
The Apology Smoothie Recipe:
Ingredients:
2 cups of vague remorse
1 heaping spoon of projection
A splash of “you’re too emotional
Garnish with: ✨emotional whiplash✨
Blend until you’re gasping for clarity and Googling “Is it still manipulation if they cry when they say it?”
Top 5 Gaslighter Apology Tropes:
The Conditional Sorry:
“I’m sorry if you were hurt.”
Like “if”? Oh sweetie, the emotional crime scene tape is still up.
The Sorry-But Combo Meal:
“I’m sorry, but you really pushed me.”
So I tripped and fell into your emotional abuse, huh? Cool.
The Poetic Deflection:
“I was drowning in my own pain, so I couldn’t see yours.”
Okay Shakespeare. Meanwhile I was building life rafts and being told I was “too much.”
The Gaslight & Go:
“You’re remembering it wrong. That’s not how it happened.”
Thank you for the unsolicited amnesia. Truly a gift.
The Romantic Saboteur:
“I hurt you because I love you too much.”
Bitch, that’s not love. That’s a Netflix documentary waiting to happen.
Chair 2 Presents:
The Museum of Misguided Guilt
An exhibit of all the times he said “I never meant to hurt you,” while doing the exact same thing every damn week with new lighting and a sad song attached.
“You Deserve Better Than Me” (But I’ll Still Keep Messaging You When I’m Lonely)”
“I’m Working on Myself” (In Theory, Not in Practice)”
“I Just Didn’t Want to Lose You” (But I Also Didn’t Want to Act Right)”
Healing Truth Drop:
A real apology includes:
Ownership.
Change in behavior.
ZERO emotional jujitsu.
An apology shouldn’t leave you exhausted, confused, or suddenly feeling like you owe them comfort.
If their "sorry" sounds like a riddle and feels like a manipulation hangover—you’re not overreacting. You’re waking up.
Sarcastic Affirmation of the Day:
“I’m not difficult. You’re just used to people folding at your half-assed ‘sorrys.’ Not anymore, boo-boo.”
Closing Line:
He said “I’m sorry” like it was a spell to keep you trapped.
You said “I’m done” like it was a declaration of war.
Guess who’s free now?
(Spoiler: It’s the one with a glitter-covered middle finger and a whole-ass blog series about healing.)

