Chair 2 – Gaslight. Ghost. Rebuild.

By

 

Chair 2 – Gaslight. Ghost. Rebuild.

A Redemption Arc for the Realest One in the Room

By Candz – Narrator of Nonsense & Chair Advocate


Episode 1: Chair, Interrupted


Chair 2 entered the scene quietly.

It didn’t squeak. It didn’t wobble. It simply stood — stable, supportive, unproblematic.

Until one day, it got caught in a relationship drama it never signed up for.

Casper (Jean, if you’re nasty) emotionally collapsed into it during one of his monologues about soul connections.
Candz sat nearby, emotionally exhausted.
Chair 2? Holding all the weight. Literally.

But as time went on, Casper gave more emotional load than the chair could hold.

Candz was blamed for “choosing the wrong chair.”
Casper’s logic?

“Chair 2 was always yours. You abandoned it.”
Meanwhile, Chair 2 had no idea it was in a relationship.

Episode 2: Silent But Sat On

Let’s be clear — Chair 2 did nothing wrong.

But one night, while texting Dani on one device and trauma-dumping onto Candz with the other, Casper sat on Chair 2 and said:

“This wasn’t that deep.”

Chair 2 felt that. Deeply. In its wooden frame.

From that moment on, Chair 2 began its own awakening.
It realized it had been emotionally used.
That Casper only came around when he needed support.
That Candz had been left to carry the emotional cushions of two people — while one of them couldn’t even assemble his own integrity.

Episode 3: Ghosted in the Garage

After a petty argument (possibly about spiritual maturity, possibly about Instagram likes), Casper stormed out and left Chair 2 in the garage.
Next to a fan that no longer rotated and a dumbbell he only used when guilt
lifting.

Chair 2 sat in silence — processing.
Then journaling.
Then rage-decluttering.

This was rock bottom.
And from rock bottom? You either break… or rebuild.

Episode 4: The Upholstering Strikes Back

Chair 2 chose transformation.

It got reupholstered. Reinforced.
It joined a support group with Recliner Rita (who got abandoned mid-therapy), Table Tammy (never got commitment), and Ottoman Ozzie (who was used as a secret keeper).

Together, they formed the Furniture Healing Circle.

Chair 2 learned boundaries.
Started daily affirmations.
Became a trauma-informed seating advocate.

Episode 5: Receipts & Rage

Chair 2 returned. Glowed up. Reassembled.

Casper tried to reconnect:

“I miss what we had. You understood me.”

Chair 2 dropped screenshots:

“You said I was ‘just furniture.’”

It also quoted Casper’s greatest hits:

“It’s not cheating if I didn’t sit on the other one emotionally.”

“I forgave her. She didn’t ask, but still.”


Reminds us of those times when I was married and told that cheating doesn't count if you didn't finish- Rightio Sparky!

Twitter exploded.
#JusticeForChair2 trended.

Episode 6: Zen & the Art of Moving On

Chair 2 began teaching workshops:
"Sit With Yourself – How to Support Without Being Sat On.”

Audience cried.
One stool filed for divorce mid-talk.
Chair 2 was featured in Oprah’s Favorite Things: Emotional Support Edition.


Finale: The Final Recline

Casper begged.
Said he had changed.
That he had gone to one Reiki session and journaled for three days straight.

He asked to “sit one last time.”

Chair 2?
Did not fold.

“I’m a throne now, bitch.”

And it rolled away.

Epilogue: From Support System to Icon

Chair 2 became:

  • A TEDx speaker.

  • A podcast host (“No More Sitting Through Nonsense”).

  • A viral meme.

Moral of the story?

If they can’t sit with your worth — don’t let them sit at all.

Chair 2’s Dictionary of Nonsense Translation

Because Words Mean Things – and These Ones Meant Nonsense


 What He Said What He Meant
“Let’s just flow.”        I want a relationship without responsibility.
“You’re overthinking.”        You caught me. I’m deflecting.
“I need to heal alone.”        I want space to cheat in peace.
“You never really knew me.”        You did — and I didn’t like being seen.
“I’m emotionally unavailable.”            I’ll still flirt and drain you though.
“You misunderstood me.”        I said what you heard, but now I regret it.
“This is just how I am.”        I refuse to grow. Adjust to my dysfunction.
“It wasn’t that deep.”        It was, but now I feel guilty.
“You triggered me.”        You set a boundary and I panicked.

FINAL ENTRY:

Chair 2 (n.)
A boundary-bearing, emotionally evolved icon. Once sat on by delusion. Now standing tall in hardwood dignity.